Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Case of the Fake People

Why is it that when you finally let your guard down and decide to trust, you get burned? I know some things are trivial but I am talking about the major back stab knife in the heart type of burn.

Yeah, well this has been my problem many times over and frankly, I am sick of it. I am sick of letting people walk all over me and just ignore the fact that this is wrong.

I finally spoke up. I set the few straight and as of now I seem to be free of the lies, drama and upset. Well, as far as I know. At first it didn’t bother me. In fact, I felt free and rejuvenated to rid myself of all this negativity. That sure didn’t last because now all I feel is pain, the mourning over lost friendships which I cared about. Even though I was the one betrayed, I know in my heart that I am not that type of person and I once did care. I still do. I once made the effort in those friendships and I genuinely cared. I think that is why it’s so upsetting.

I feel as almost this is no win situation. Either way you’re screwed. You have only two choices in this matter (at least all I am aware of). Should you sit back and continue to be treated unfairly or do you end the friendship? I chose to end the friendships and now I am not too sure I made the right decision. Although, I know I would not have been satisfied continuing to let myself to be walked on either.

I have always been the type of person who could count my friends on one hand. I’m not talking about people I know and am acquaintances with; I am talking about those true friends. The kind you feel like they will last forever. Maybe this is my fault? Maybe I am just a bad judge of character. Either way this situation sucks. I thought these friendships were different. I guess I thought wrong.

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